Please God No

Males all over the country praised the new line of "anti-vaginal stink" condoms released by Trojan brand condoms this week.
"It is a standard latex condom with a Pine-scented car freshener attached to the base", stated Trojan CEO Linda Kaplan Thaler earlier this afternoon. "No pregnancy, no STD's, and now... no smell! What an innovation!"
"If a vagina doesn't stink, it's an anomaly, I don't care how fat or skinny your hoe is", Terry Steindel, a realtor from the Ramsey, Minnesota stated Sunday.
"This device not only makes my girlfriend's snatch smell like a towel-head middle-eastern cab driver, but it also makes it not smell like a vagina... which is nasty."
Steindel, who recently stuffed local mailboxes with a cheap Staples brand double sided black and white photocopy of his latest pamphlet entitled, "Why I am are the best lover", continued...
"It makes her vagina smell like a Iraqi, and it makes my balls smell like an equally-attractive pine-scented computer support engineer from India."
Computer manufacturers Dell and Gateway could not be reached for comment as of press.