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Terry Steindel, The most retarded real estate agent ever.

Have you ever read a book report written by a high school freshman? Have you ever asked a guy with Down Syndrome for street directions? If you answered yes to either of these questions, then you most likely will appreciate this flyer.

This dumbass stuffs crap into my mailbox twice a month.

Is he for real??? "Work the internet"?

This is the single worst, most poorly written waste of the advertising dollar I have ever seen.
<-----Click on the image to blow up the .pdf

Jerry Falwell stunned to find self in hell.

Jerry Falwell "stunned" to find himself in hell, it was reported Tuesday.
"I thought I spent my life hating all the right people," Falwell stated. "The pagans, abortionists, feminists, gays ,and lesbians... You know, all the people in this country that drove away God from keeping 9/11 from happening."
When asked about future plans for his eternity in hell spent nashing his teeth while choking back sulfuric maggots, Falwell stated, "I guess I'll probably start exercising more, and maybe spend more time with family and friends."
"I know it might seem bad now... Spending an eternal existence in hell having multiple partner's penises in and out of every hole in my body," joked Falwell, "But when Pat Robertson gets here it will seem just like another average Saturday night."

1 cup Kashi GoLEAN Crunch + 1/2 cup milk = Endless stomach churning gas.

Ounce for ounce, there is no other substance on the face of the Earth that will more consistently produce as many hours of unabated flatulence than Kashi GoLEAN Crunch.
If you have never had a bowl of Kashi GoLEAN cereal, trust me, go get a box. Eat a big bowl right before work or church or parent-teacher conferences.
It starts for me about 2 - 3 hours after ingestion. I can almost set my watch by it.
The first sign that Kashi is working is a knot-like feeling in the stomach. Kind of like a slip knot. A sharp knot that all the sudden lets go. This is followed 25-30 seconds later by a surprising fart with an unusual amount of mass.
For the next 5 hours, the gas gets so unusually intense and frequent you will barely be able to keep a straight face while doing regular daily activities.
I have been kicked out of supermarkets, gas stations, bars, restaurants, and outdoor soccer games because of my relationship with Kashi.
The only way I could love Kashi GoLEAN crunch more than I already do, is if it tasted edible like most foods do.
But alas; I would toss Al Sharpton's salad if I was guaranteed a 5 hour endless stream of explosive gas.

-----Update 8-14-08-----
I am obviously not alone.
Let's start posting actual recordings of your actual farts here on this thread! Please record your greatest Kashi farts via any means necessary! (Recorder, cell phone, computer mic, etc). I will post them here! It will be a GAS! Please convert your fart sounds into any readable computer format (.wav, .mp3, etc) and email them here.
I will "pass" the credit onto the "end" user. Don't be lazy! Record your Kashi farts!!!

-----Update 2-25-11-----
From user Pegha